We’ve been discussing trite openings and plotlines the last couple of weeks here at BETWEEN THE SHEETS. With so much blather about what is good and what isn’t, how to be inspired, and how to avoid falling between the cracks, I’ved decided to run a contest–an opening line contest. And I have some VERY EXCELLENT PRIZES. Trust me. You want to enter. So let’s do it!
WHAT
Submit the most creative opening line (of a novel) you can come up with in 160 characters or less, spaces included (like a tweet profile byline or a text). Make it dazzling. Entice me. The top three most intriguing will WIN WIN WIN prizes.
WHO SHOULD PARTICIPATE
1. Writers in need of honest feedback for their opening chapter or scene
2. Writers who could use expert marketing/platform advice, need help promoting an upcoming book release, or need direction from a media coach expert before hitting the conference circuit.
HOW TO SIGN UP
1. Sign up with your name and opening line in the comments section of this post (No more than TWO entries per person). Your opening line doesn’t have to be “real”, it just needs to get me all hot and bothered about the story you’re selling. Show me your creative badassery.
2. Be sure to read others and talk about your favorites.
3. Share the contest on Twitter, Facebook, or Google+, etc. No, I will not be stalking your every move, but would genuinely appreciate your cooperation. (I’ll send you a bucket-load of good karma.)
4. Check back on FEBRUARY 24th for the conclusion of the contest. Winners will be posted.
5. I’d love it if you followed me. Also NOT required. I ain’t that shallow, but let me know if you do and I’ll follow back.
SPECIAL INSTRUCTIONS
1. Both unpublished and published authors may enter
2. All genres welcome
3. In the event there are fewer than 10 participants, the prize will not include Shari’s consultation, so round up some folks to enter!
WINNERS
Winners will be announced on FEBRUARY 24TH. I will post the top three as well as email those who have won. Good luck and pass it on!!
PRIZES
FIRST PLACE: A critique of your opening chapter up to ten pages or 4,000 words by beta reader extraordinaire (yours truly), AND a FREE thirty minute phone consultation from multi-pubbed author, magazine editor, and media expert SHARI STAUCH of SHARK MARKETING. Shari will assist you with your social media platforms (how to use them, how to increase your traffic, how to reach your target audience), coach you on improvements to your blog/website, or make suggestions on promotional details for your book release. Don’t have a website? Shark Marketing specializes in websites for authors as well as writers conference websites. This is a fan-tab-ulous prize!
SECOND PLACE: A critique of your opening scene or up to 2,000 words AND a book of your choice (below).
THIRD PLACE: A critique of your opening scene up to 1,000 words.
Good luck, everyone!
BOOKS
(The spacing is wonky & driving me nuts, but alas, I can’t fix it. You and I will have to deal with it.)
46 Comments
Join the conversation and post a comment.
Trackbacks/Pingbacks
- First Lines Contest at Blog: Between the Sheets | Lindsay Kitson – Dieselpunk Author - [...] has commented on liking the first line of The Eyelet Dove, so when someone tweeted about a first lines…
Leave a Comment
About Heather Webb
Heather’s historical novels have received national starred reviews, been featured in print media including the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal, and have been chosen as a Goodreads Top Pick in 2015. To date, her books have sold in a dozen countries. She enjoys helping other writers and may often be found tweeting helpful links, writing craft articles, or speaking about the industry and her love of books at conferences and retreats. For more information, see her AUTHOR page.
Order LAST CHRISTMAS IN PARIS
BN.com
Amazon.com
IndieBound
Order RODIN'S LOVER
BN.com
Amazon
IndieBound
Heather’s Newsletter
Auguston stumbled against the boulder, the shaft of the arrow biting into his unprotected bloody side.
I did not want to become a cliché, but there it was in print: “Woman kills ex-husband with a nutty gooey chocolate chip cookie.”
Oh la la! Not so cliche! Not sure about the error. I’ll look into it. Thanks for your entry!
Mama mia! These are not prizes, these are priceless gems straight from the pirate’s treasure chest!!!! Okay, so before I plant my “Line” here, does it need to be a “real” 1st line from something we’ve done, or are working on, or just a random fabulous 1st line invented for the pure joy of attempting to win one of your fabulous prizes???!!!
Haha, Barbara. I’m glad you like the prizes. 🙂 No, your line does not have to be “real”. You can absolutely make it up. I just wanted to see some skills–people drawing the reader in immediately! 🙂 I’d love to see one of your lines!!
Beth clung desperately to the wedding ring quilt wrapped tightly around her shoulders, but its warmth had no power to penetrate the icy burden in her heart.
If we are allowed more than one entry, here is one more. “She felt his eyes bore into her back as keenly as if a knife had pierced her flesh.”
More than one entry is okay. I’ll add that to the rules, but I’m going to cap it at two. Thanks, Diane.
Jeanne-Louise stood in the inky darkness frozen with fear watching a screaming baby suspended, rivulets of blood running from its tiny body!
A velvet Curtain brushed against Jeanne-Louise and she realized to her horror She had moved and drawn attention to herself.
He told lies the way some people make love; hard, often, and more than a little dirty.
OMG! Love it, Barbara. Hilarious…
A painting undermined my father. And, as you will see by the end of my story, a painting nearly destroyed me. Art is dangerous like that, an unruly thing.
(and this is the actual opening from my novel — good luck to all! Really love the consultation especially since I need to completely relaunch my site to include my fiction.)
Thanks for entering, Kris. I’d love to read this novel of yours.
I need to ask a question was their any time frame? I notice most of these are current and mine is set in the 1600’s in France…love yours Barbara!
Any time or genre is welcome. And what do you write about, Marilyn. I’m a Frenchie girl, myself.
Historical Fiction set in the court of Louis XIV with all its mayhem…love Frenchie anything..its all so deliciously rich…
This is from one of my WiPs called “The Tracks”.
Opening lines:
Not an hour goes by that I don’t replay that night in my mind at least once. When I’m lucky, it’s only once.
“How can you be so reckless?” Jared yelled.
“How can you be so annoying?” I countered.
“Mallory, we have a crisis!” Sheron Farr waltzed into Mallory Steele’s office, a black wool crepe gown on a hanger billowing behind her.
Standing in front of the mirror, a woman in a white wedding dress with blotchy eyes stared back. What should be the happiest day of her life was turning into heartache and major heartburn.
There had been a moment when Jeff could have changed things, maybe even calmed her down and they wouldn’t be here, but instead he’d said, “I dare you.”
ohhhhhhh. It’s getting spicy around here. Thanks for your entries, folks. 🙂
I always knew that when I died I would probably go to Heaven, but I never imagined that there would be a padlock on the gates when I got there.
A witch, a priest and a demigod walk into a bar.
The original plan definitely had not ended with exploding chickens.
From current WIP: “Male grunts and thuds of fists connecting with muscle ricocheted from down the alley as Anya quietly walked to her car, deliberately not looking toward the sounds.”
2nd entry: “Another dead pensioner zombie, she thought as his gold teeth gleamed in the headlights of her Mercedes.”
If the key to announcing bad news was all in the timing, George Upperton’s mistress possessed impeccable sense.
Reality is an oxymoron. At least it feels that way when you find out nothing in your life is real.
A good makeup artist can make anyone look beautiful. Even a dead woman.
Oops! Can I add a little bit to my last “first line” submission?
A good makeup artist can make anyone look beautiful. Even a dead woman.
Actually, Miss Ethelyn looked better dead. Hard to believe she looked so alive—if less glamorous—when I saw her yesterday.
Hey, Caryl. Thank you for your entry. 🙂 The first line or up to 160 characters is all that is being judged.
Mary stood silently on the doorstep of the servant’s entrance to Eden’s Palace, London’s most infamous whorehouse, daring herself to knock.
The night before their first engagement with the union army, Trace’s sergeant advised his troops to masturbate.
My entry:
“Six feet, five,” I said. Jimmy stared at me.
“That’s wrong,” his brother William said, shooting me a panicked look.
Jimmy couldn’t help me.
– Stacy S. Jensen
Cool contest! Here’s my first entry:
I stood seething in the filthy, urine-drenched straw, hands on cold metal bars. Arrested, publicly beaten, sold like a feed cow, slave’s tattoo on my wrist…
And here’s my second entry (from working draft of a novel, so would love feedback from you or blog readers):
Shae Blessing knew waiting tables for a living was for the birds. As soon as she got out of foster care, she planned to get the hell out of town and start over.
Hi Michele, Thank you for your entry! As for your opening in the WIP, I would pare it down, personally. Maybe try: “Shae planned to get the hell out of town and start over–as soon as she got out of foster care.”
Be careful of cliche phrases like “for the birds”. Also, this is obviously a YA novel since the protag is in foster care. I’m pretty sure a teen wouldn’t say “for the birds” at all, but something more like “sucks”, “bites the big one” or something along those lines. These are, of course, only my humble opinion. Feel free to ignore what you don’t agree with! Good luck and keep writing. 🙂
Good observations. I can see the usefulness of tightening it up. And yeah,the cliche… Well, I’ll give it some thought. Thank you!
Just stumbled upon this contest. Great entries! Have now followed both the blog and [at]msheatherwebb on Twitter.
My two favourite entries are the ones from Barbara Forte Abate and Kris, but the overall quality of all the entries is pretty amazing. Will send my own entry soon.
I clutch my wine glass and watch Viv stop eating, her eyelids fluttering as her mind shifts to an alternate reality. I loosen my collar, almost afraid to meet the alter ego who will take her place.
-This is from my WIP (complete first draft). The opening has gone through gazillion edits and rewrites, so I’m interested in knowing if this latest incarnation grabs the reader.
Thanks, Heather, for this great contest!
No place better to be on a warm Saturday evening that looking for a whore in Bonnytown.
It has not been winter in Iskale since the day I was born.
I like H.L. Pauff’s, and both of Killian Mcrae’s, and Caryl Cain’s second one too.
Hmm… ok, I’ll bite.
Entry 1:They stood in the shadows, their long cloaks fading into the inky blackness, whispering intensely to one another, trying not to wake whoever lived in the nearby house. But Jack was already up.
Entry 2:
It was to be a long journey, he thought.
He was right.
I like Kris’s Art opener–the art runs strong in my family, and the levels of dangerous art intreague me. I also like both of Killian’s entries–the joke makes me think, “oh no…” which is an awesome hook, and the chicken bombs… well, they’re exploding chickens! I have to know what’s connected to that!